One of these is not like the others!

All foreigners look alike.

White- CHECK!

Male- CHECK!
Part Bald Head- CHECK!
Part Shaved head- CHECK!

In America: You shaved your head! You look like Uncle Fester!


In Japan: Eeeh! You look like

a)Bruce Willis! OR b)Jason Stratham!

One of these is not like the others!

Here I go again...

...but not on my own.

I didn't even check to see when my last blog entry was. It just seems like last year I was welcoming a son （Kai：海）into the world.

So, I'd like to take this time to welcome his sister, Maya (真彩):

Here she is at roughly 100 days!

And here they are together:
The studio occasion is Maya's o-miyamairi.
(please click to learn what that is!)

So how is that for an update? I will be back before kid number three! Just kidding! I'm kidding about the kid number three. Can you imagine?

Yankees, Rabbits, The Undead, The Office

To prove that I have been out and about here are a few pics from the last couple of months. Enjoy!

Doesn't this cloud look like a rabbit? This might be one of those 'you had to be there things' but I was impressed. Also, rabbits and Japan go hand in hand.

Here's a picture of my desk at one of my schools. I'm not supposed to be taking pictures as there's a chance a student's pic could end up on some kind of unsavory website but I think I'm in the clear with this one. I'm right in front of the Principal and Vice-Principal: joy.

At lunch the other day, I was enjoying my quite fresh sashimi and sushi when my fish started twitching. Within a few seconds, Noriko's and J-Pop's fish also started to go ZOMBIE. That's fresh seafood!

If you can't read it, the guy on the left is wearing a NY Yankees hat and is number 55. That would be Mr. Matsui. The guy on the right is dressed in typical chinpira clothes. A chinpira is a young punk, young gangster wannabe, young yakuza/mafia guy. Chinpira is the old word. Nowadays, they are called Yankees! That's your Japanese slang less of the day.

Nothin' But Kai

Nothing But Kai- Just so you know we are still out and about, here are a few pics of the little ninja nearing three weeks of age. Thanks for dropping in!

The Time of Kai, 1:39 am

There are a few words that the first time (and sometimes subsequent times) you hear them spoken, your life changes. "I love you" tops the list and "I don't love you anymore" is also sure to make your day.

I was headed to a student's house when Noriko buzzed my cellphone. The five little words that changed my life were: "I think my water broke." I plotted the quickest route back home (in Japan, u-turns are easier spelled then done) and called my student to cancel class.

I got Noriko loaded up and to the hospital at around 5pm. They ushered us into the delivery room and the waiting game began. Around 8pm with the waiting game still on, one of the nurses announced visiting hours were over.

About midnight, I got the call from the hospital. "Noriko-san's husband? Please come to the hospital. Do you understand? Please come to the hosiptal- to the fourth floor. Please be here in thirty minutes."

I ran the three blocks to our parking space and took off. It was all I could do to remember to stay on the left side of the street. At the hospital, I took the stairs and sprinted up the four flights. I swung open Noriko's door and presented myself ready for action.

I asked Noriko how soon the pushing would start. She nonchalantly looked up from the bed and said it would be "a long time away." Catching my breath, I sat down on the floor.

Fifteen hours later (that's twenty-two total hours for you math nuts), with three nurses and a midwife on the business end and me on the other end, my son entered the world.

"KAI"

"海"

April, 11th, 2007

1:39 pm

2006 Pictures/Video of Horseback Archery

I took these pictures and recorded this footage in 2006. Enjoy.

2nd Demo of my battojutsu sensei...

Here's another video of my sensei doing some "tameshigiri" at a local politician's fundraiser.

Engrish Quiz 2

Here's the long awaited, followup to the not-so-popular Engrish guessing quiz!

First up, a little establishment named "Zero Care." What is it they apparently have zero care for?

What gives this little devil cause to scream for his Creator?

What would you pay for a simple, cotton tshirt with "Honey I HEART U" on the front and "DSQUARED Always Fresh MotherF@cker" on the back?

And for a couple of other questionable (at least in my book) marketing ideas:

KISS is the new spokesmodel for the Canon camera model of the same name. It looks like Godzilla signed on, too. I can make the obvious connection: KISS the band/Kiss the camera. The commercials feature kids painted up as Gene Simmons' the Beast, running to and fro having one heck of a time. I don't remember the original KISS having such a family-friendly image.

Lastly, why would anybody name their clothing brand "Glory Hole"? If you don't know what a glory hole is, then it's best to just leave it alone. I am not responsible for what an internet search might yield. Minors (and most adults) not allowed.

Thirty-First Things, First

For those of you that didn't know, we are expecting our first little one in May. Actually the due date is May, 5th (Last weekend she was 31 weeks). Not only is it a holiday in Mexico, but it's one in Japan, too: Boy's Day. Nationwide, families with sons will put out scaled down models of samurai armor and weapons. Without resorting to wikipedia, these items are all symbols of boys growing into strong men. Needless to say, it would be quite auspicious to be born on that day (and be a boy). Oh yeah, it's a boy!

I finally got Noriko to stand still and let me take a picture. I had to convince her that it's not fair that everyone over here can see her while everyone back home doesn't get the chance.

If all goes well, I can finally put all those things I read about in dog-training books to good use. Sit. Stay. Get in the box. Pee on the newspaper.

Once, a niece of mine, convinced I had a cold heart, told me "One day, when you have kids, you'll care." Now, where does a pre-ten year old get this kind of thing to say?

Please keep us in your thoughts.

Return of the Yokie

MIC CHECK ONE, TWO... IS THIS THING ON?

I was looking at the previous blog entry and seeing that it was dated Dec. 23rd, I tried to find the most recent one. After a couple of clicks I realized that that was my most recent one.

What happened to all those funny things I had to say and all those funny pictures? What kind of wacky things have been going on over here?

Anyway, I'm back (I think) and I hope we can get caught up in the next few posts.